Navigating The First Christmas After Separation
We all know that whilst Christmas is the most wonderful time of the year, it can also be extremely stressful managing the family dynamics. This is particularly true if you are newly separated, divorced or not living with your children’s other parent.
The key advice from family lawyers at Hodge Jones & Allen is to plan ahead. Making a clear and detailed agreement for where and how the children will spend their time is crucial to try iron out any disagreements that may arise in advance. Recording your agreements in a written format can also add clarity and structure later down the line. This can be done effectively in any format – by simply writing your arrangements on an email/piece of paper or – if you want more formality and guidance on the issues that should and could be covered – by creating a Parenting Plan.
If your children are not spending Christmas with you this year, make sure that you make plans and see family and friends. More often than not, the Court approach is for Christmas to be either shared or alternated between parents. If the children are not spending Christmas with you this year, make sure that Christmas 2025 is agreed in advance.
A helpful resource for planning your time effectively are shared calendars. There are many online applications that allow you to share a calendar with one of your contacts. This ensures that important events for the children – such as school commitments, nativities, and parties with friends – can be recorded and checked easily without the need for constant correspondence.
If discussions break down or you cannot agree, mediation is always available to try to reach a written decision. Hodge Jones & Allen offer a family mediation service, where our trained mediator will meet with you face-to-face to facilitate an open discussion of the issues and options available to you, with the aim of assisting you to reach an agreement. Another option available (and offered by Hodge Jones & Allen) is collaborative law. This is a process whereby both parties appoint collaborative solicitors and the matter is resolved over a series of round-table meetings. If time is of the essence, collaborative law can help resolve matters quickly and efficiently as all collaborative practitioners have a focus on resolution (see our blog on collaborative law for more information).
Lastly, if either of you are planning on taking the children abroad for the holiday period, it is important to get the other parent’s consent. It is potentially a criminal offence (abduction) to remove a child from the UK without consent of the other parent or without a court order. In addition, the non-travelling parent is entitled to know the details of your travel plans, including flights, where the children will be staying, and contact details to communicate with them when they are away. Make sure to also check the travel requirements for the country you are planning to travel to in advance of your trip, as certain countries may require you to carry specific documentation.
Most parents will try and often can agree to a fair sharing of time over the holiday period and Christmas will run smoothly. However, in circumstances where you are unable to agree, or where you are worried about the safety of your child, our expert Family Law Solicitors are here to help, contact us now on 0330 822 3451 or request a callback online.